The Angry Corrie 1: May 1991

Fashion

A fashion page in a hillwalking fanzine? - Surely some mistake here. On the contrary, hillwalkers are slaves to fashion of a most obscure form. No Levi 501's on Ben Ledi, granted, but walkers are driven by dictates that are far from utilitarian. For example...

BEARDS:

Completely passe in Civvy Street since the first Crosby Stills & Nash album, these items of hirsutia are still to be seen in disproportionate number all over our hills. Dripping with snotters on the hill and Guinness in the pub, they are presumably the result of the high-profile Boningtons of this world - who presumably have a good excuse for theirs: i.e. shaving is difficult in a snowhole.

BREECHES:

Completely passe in Civvy Street since whenever Blackadder was meant to be around, these mysterious garments offer no obvious advantages over, say, tracksuit bottoms. Suggestive of plus-fours, they hint at buffoonery and aristocracy. The tweed ones smell when wet. Doesn't the wee bit of skin between them and the socks get cold?.

BRUSHED ALUMINIUM BOTTLES:

Everyone has one. What do they think it is - a bit of hi-fi? A plastic ginger bottle costs nothing and weighs less.

RUNNING SHOES:

After the day's labours, walkers without exception ease their weary feet in running shoes. Comfy as they are, they become soaked in about three strides across the boggy ground of the Sligachan campsite, or Clachaig carpark. A pair of Doc Martens costs about twenty quid and keeps out the wet quite well.

warbeck productions 1991

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